Wednesday, January 2, 2008

gemini spinning

I actually asked her if she wanted to meditate.
Do you believe it? So i grabbed my sleeping bag
and we left our boyfriends behind
walked out into the trees until
they cleared themselves for us
parked the mat
under the boughs
and sat.

The most important thing to do during meditation
is to clear one’s mind of thoughts
and as soon as we did, we could hear our hearts thinking
so loudly that
it only echoed wild emotional harmonies
between our hearts in the clear sky
stars like freckles smiled at us as the moon gave us her blessing
and i leaned to kiss her.

It was a beautiful, innocent thing, the kiss,
and as we picked out constellations in the sky
we became Gemini spinning, she and i
reflected through the branches in the sky
the world
stopped
for the cosmos to spin around us.

How could i tell her i loved her
when we’d both have to go back to our boyfriends
before they noticed us gone long?

Coz we were long gone we
replaced Gemini in the sky
i found constellations in her eyes
tasted heaven in her mouth
found a rain between her thighs
while she held me there…
Her gratified sighs harmonized with the breeze
passing through the trees…
and her cornsilk hair curled around her neck.
I kissed her there, we held each other
talked little and thought long about futures and pasts
the present she gave me had me dreaming
of flying away with her
to build us a bed in the big dipper
leaving all our friends behind;
we were at a party, see, everyone camping,
but we never feared discovery.
The moon smiled at us, and though we were too young
and too attached to voice it,
she saw our love and reflected it back at us
laughed at us
"I’ve kept so many lovers safe—"
she told us
"—you are my beautiful twin daughters…"
and we were.

How many loves have you held in your hands that you let get away?
It’s a lie, when they say
that you don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone.
I knew before i had her what a star she was,
and when i had her again, later,
i let her go once more.
It’s terrible, promises we make when we’re young and younger,
too young we were both promised to others,
and we two-sided Geminis turned back to our Leo and Taurus
like so many before us
I’ve kept in contact with the moon, my mother,
i am her Virgo and she saw me through my attachment
waited for me on the other side and
helped me to see how sweet freedom can be
i’ve promised myself temporarily to celibacy
to help. me. love. me.

and if she ever comes back to me i know
the moon will smile on us again
and we’ll be Gemini spinning,
spinning
again.

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